Spoons Wedges

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POLL: If you HAD to choose...?

Would you rather wedge the ties of a fork between your bottom teeth and then wrench the fork sideways, or jam a wooden spoon handle upwards through you nostril into your sinuses with the palm of your hand.
Wouldn't do either to myself. Pain is gay. If I had to choose, I'd say fork in the teeth though.

Realistically, if there was NO other choice,

I'd go with the fork twist because the spoon up the nostrils into the sinuses would make me bleed to death from my brain.

I would hope the fork twisting up my gums wouldn't make me bleed to death or contract infection.

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